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How to Write and Deliver a Groom Speech – Guidance and Examples

By: Compose.ly — December 28, 2018

Groom hugging bride in a field

Table of Contents

  1. Why Write a Groom Speech?
  2. Five Tips for Writing the Speech
  3. Five Tips for Actually Giving the Speech
  4. A Few Examples of Groom Speeches
  5. Need Help? Hire a Speechwriter

You’re getting married! Let’s say that line a bit slower until it sinks in. You’re. Getting. Married. To the love of your life. To your best friend. To the one who adores you despite all of your eccentricities. You are remembering to breathe, right?

As that exciting day approaches little by little, you’ve likely seen your home, your parents’ home and maybe even your soon-to-be in-laws’ home inundated with wedding ideas, scrapbooks, magazine cuttings, decorations, floral arrangements and more.

You’ve (hopefully!) booked the venue and chosen your wedding party, and you’ve likely listened to plenty of love songs that are all in the running for “your song.” You might have even booked your honeymoon trip for somewhere tropical, somewhere historical, or even somewhere just a few hours away. Whoever said you needed to travel the globe to have a honeymoon to remember?

Now what you need to do is sit down and write a speech that you’ll share with friends and family at your reception dinner.

Why Should You Give a Speech at Your Wedding?

Because it’s fun! And it’s a nice thing to do.

Need more? How about because you’re a considerate guy, you want to thank people for coming to your wedding, and you want to honor your new spouse and the life you’ll share together.

This will be your time to stand before your guests and show your gratitude for their love and support. You might be a bit nervous at the thought of gushing about your bride, but don’t be. She’ll love hearing even a few sweet words.

And don’t worry if you choke up while speaking. Everyone will understand, and many people will likely choke up with you. This is a wedding, after all. Weddings and happy tears (at least we hope they’re happy!) go hand in hand.

The Five-Step Plan for Writing Groom Speeches

Grooms come in all shapes and sizes, and so do their personalities. In other words, not all grooms will be eager to jump up and dazzle the crowd with out-of-this-world wit and eloquence. And honestly, perfection is overrated. Just be your own beautiful self, in whatever way that means to you.

Groom speeches are as unique as the men who stand up and speak them, and so there are dozens of ways to produce a heartfelt speech that incorporates exactly what you want to say.

If you and your bride have decided to co-write a speech, you’ll likely have more confidence and direction in what to say. If you’ve decided to make your own speech or to speak on behalf of yourself and your bride, you might be feeling those butterflies just about now.

It’s no different if there are two grooms at the wedding ceremony; just decide whether one of you will speak, both of you will speak independently or both of you will share one speech – and then take a few deep, relaxing breaths.

These assurances are great and all, but they’re probably not moving you any closer to finishing your speech, are they? What should be in a groom’s speech? Let’s answer that with the following five steps. You can move through these steps as you craft a wedding speech that’s sure to delight your guests.

1. Acknowledge and Thank Your Guests

The first thing you want to do after you pick up the microphone is take a quick scan of the audience. The people sitting around and before you are there because they wanted to share this special day with you. They took time off work, booked flights, packed suitcases, traveled hours by car (or just around the block) and did it all with a smile and a gift for your wedding registry.

These people are special!

Start with a sincere thank you to everyone, extending your appreciation for their attendance at your wedding – using “our.” No, that’s not a typo! Unless you’re marrying yourself – you could try it, but it would likely be a lackluster marriage – you absolutely must remember that this is not your day. This is your and your spouse’s day.

Make sure you include words like “we,” “us” and “our” to signify your new bond.

You should also acknowledge and thank your parents and your new in-laws. They chipped in some – or let’s be frank, most – of the money for your wedding, and without their support your big day might have looked completely different. Your parents spent years of their life providing for you, and your in-laws did the same for your spouse. They deserve some love.

2. Introduce Your Spouse

Now it’s time for the main attraction: the person who captured your heart. Since this is your wedding day, you should introduce your new bride and share a few words of adoration.

Make sure you’re facing your spouse at this point. It’s perfectly okay to look around the room as you talk about them, but make sure your eyes are locked with theirs as soon as you say the words meant just for them.

Your spouse is the reason you’re standing there in front of people. Your friends and family love you, of course, but they didn’t come all this way just to hear you ramble on about your favorite song or your newest gadget experiment. They want to hear about how special this person is, and how much you love being together.

3. Share Some Stories

Once you introduce your spouse and cause more than a few blushes, your next task will be to share some stories.

You could start with a recent memory before moving to those early ones, or you could skip back in time immediately. People love hearing about how couples first met, with the next most common request being how you became engaged. Give the people what they want!

Make sure that any other stories you tell don’t put your spouse in a bad light. You can use some self-deprecating humor, but do not put down your partner in an effort to get some laughs or to keep people entertained.

Of course, that’s not to say you should automatically claim that your spouse is perfect and never does anything wrong. No one is perfect all the time. You just need to be genuine while refraining from anything too personal or embarrassing. Above all, you want to share the reasons why you fell in love and all the ways that you’re a better person for getting to know and then marrying your spouse.

4. End With a Toast

The last thing in your list to include should be the toast. Whatever you do, don’t try to include too many categories in your toast, or worse, try to toast each group separately. You’ll be tipsy before you know it, and your bride will be left feeling more than a bit uncomfortable.

It is completely appropriate to say something like, “I want to raise a glass to my beautiful bride, my parents and in-laws, everyone in our wedding party and everyone who could join us today. We feel your love and can’t thank you enough for helping make this day a complete success.” And after a sip of wine, bubbly or whatever else is being served, you can hand off the microphone and relax.

5. Practice Your Speech Repeatedly

You’ve written your speech, but you’re not quite finished. So don’t try to run off and visit your best buds just yet.

Now you need to start practicing your speech, and by practicing we mean saying your speech aloud – a lot. While you’ll gain some benefit from reading your speech over and over, it will pale in comparison to the benefits you’ll gain from saying it.

Speaking gives you a chance to hear all those times you pause awkwardly or slip in sounds like “um” and “uh.” You’ll be able to see how quickly you read, giving yourself enough time to practice slowing things down.

People toasting at wedding in grayscale

Five Bonus Tips Just for You!

Because we care, we’ve added five more tips to help you write a fantastic groom speech.

1. Don’t Try to Produce a Novel

Your speech shouldn’t be pages and pages long. No one wants to listen to a novel-length speech, even from the groom. All you’ll end up doing is causing your audience to develop glassy eyes as they think about an upcoming vacation or how much laundry they’ll have to do when they get home. Your speech should last no more than 5 to 6 minutes.

2. Don’t Forget to Pause Every So Often

As you speak, remember to pause and take a quick breath. Otherwise you could let your nervousness take control, resulting in a speech that falls flat because no one can understand it.

3. Don’t Include Gift Giving During Your Speech

Giving gifts to the bridesmaids, the mother of the bride and the mother of the groom is a traditional gesture during the groom’s speech. If you choose to continue the gift-giving tradition, don’t do it during your speech – it’s awkward for most guests and causes a lot of delays. Wait until later to give out gifts. It will allow people a chance to refocus and refuel.

4. Do Wear a Comfortably Fitting Tux or Suit

You’ll be able to relax and stay comfortable when you’re dressed appropriately. Whether you choose a tux or a suit, make sure it’s neither too big nor too small, and that it’s the right thickness for the weather conditions. Roasting away in a fancy suit won’t help you succeed.

5. Do Look at Your Spouse

Nerves can get the better of you, and that’s why you should look at your spouse as often as you need to while speaking. Just one look at that warm, loving face can be more than enough to settle any anxiety.

Bride holding groom's hand

Groom Speeches: A Few Examples

To help you create the ideal groom wedding speech, just look at the five examples below. These speech examples will give you options for what to include in a grooms speech.

1. Groom Speech

This first speech is from a groom who begins by thanking his guests for traveling so far to see him marry his coffee shop bride.

The Speech

Hi, everyone, I want to express my gratitude for all the love Remi and I have received today. Seeing so many familiar faces in the group has been heartwarming, and it’s all the more magical when I stop to realize that it’s all for us.

Some of you came from a long way away, with numerous flight connections and several hours of driving to get to this place. We dreamed of a romantic retreat surrounded by trees and little creatures of the woods, but clearly, we underestimated how long it would take to get to. Thank you for making the journey to see us get married.

We also want to thank our parents for their generous wedding donations and the years of putting up with us. I can’t speak for Remi, but I know that my parents spent many of my high-school years pulling out their hair and worrying about whether I’d make it home without crashing. If you’ve ever wondered why my dad’s eyebrows are worn thin, well, I’ll have to take the blame there.

And now, I want to formally introduce my wife, Remi. I’ll never forget the first time we met. It was a rainy December night and I’d run into a coffee shop in downtown Seattle. In comes this gorgeous girl, fighting with an umbrella that was threatening to turn itself inside out. I ran over and helped her, and her sweet smile just melted my heart.

It wasn’t long before we started meeting there regularly, and I just knew that here was the woman I wanted to spend my life with.

I’d like to raise a glass to Remi, our parents and our wonderful guests. Thank you for coming tonight, and Remi, thank you for loving me.

2. Long Groom Speech

What should be in a groom’s speech? If you’re like this groom, you’re known for your happy chatter and your love of family and pranks.

The Speech

Well, I guess it’s time for my speech now, and you know me, I never shut up. So all I can say is that I hope you brought your PJs, ’cause we might be here all night.

But really, I’m just so happy and in love and married! Wow. I’m a married man. With a dazzling wife. I guess that makes me the luckiest guy in the world.

Family is really important to us, and so our first thanks go out to our parents for their never-ending support and love. My brothers and sisters have gone out of their way to welcome Sofia into the family, and I’m so grateful they agreed not to go through with the initiation ceremony. Sofia doesn’t know this, but she was almost going to be wearing a fuzzy bear suit while running through the forest on a clear, moonlit night. Just kidding. Or am I?

Sofia is my bride, and I hope to provide her with a happy home and plenty of laughter. Sofia, I am deeply flattered that you agreed to marry me. You could have said no, but amazingly, you said yes. You looked at the note I’d written in the sand and without hesitation said yes, you’d marry me.

I was glad you didn’t hesitate because I was panicking when I saw the waves approaching; I knew my message would disappear. We tried to snap a photo, but the waves had already pushed their way through. That was one of the happiest days of my life, though, second only to today.

Today we exchanged vows while overlooking the sea, watching the grasses waving in the breeze and the birds soaring on the air currents. Today there were friends and family around us, watching us take our first steps as husband and wife.

This is a day we’ll remember forever. Thank you to everyone for such a wonderful day.

3. Short Groom Toast

This third speech is a short toast in which the groom can’t help but express his admiration for his loving spouse.

The Speech

Hello, everyone. I plan to keep this speech short and sweet, just like my wonderful husband. Today is the start of a new life together, one with coffee and muffins to welcome the morning, and herbal tea with lemon to welcome the night.

Thank you to everyone who could make it to our wedding, and to everyone who couldn’t make it but sent their love all the same. We are blessed to be married in the presence of so many loving faces.

We’d like to send special thanks to my mom and Leon’s parents for not questioning our desire to be married outdoors in the middle of a blazing hot summer, and for providing a loving home that allowed us to express who we are.

Leon, you are the best thing that could have happened to me. We first met three years ago to the day, which therefore means these have been the best one thousand and ninety five days of my life.

Where was I before you? Lonely, depressed, working at a burger shop and trying not to let fried oil smells invade my apartment from the uniforms we had to wear. It was the same thing day in and day out, but then one day you walked by me on the sidewalk and suddenly the world got a few degrees brighter.

Within minutes of talking to you, I’d cracked my first grin in weeks. Within hours of talking to you, I was in love.

Here’s to you, Leon, and the road ahead.

4. Funny Groom Speech

Those with a funny bone will appreciate how this groom gets right to the heart of the matter – how most people just run from his speeches. He keeps the mood light and keeps the audience entertained.

The Speech

Hello, everyone! If you thought you’d managed to escape one of my usual event speeches, you’re out of luck there.

But before you just pack up and head out, let me reassure you that this speech will actually be good. This is my wedding day, you know. Can’t have the masses screaming and running in fear, like they did in The Blob.

I wanted to use the first half of this speech to discuss all the best things about my French bulldog, Oscar, including how he carried that proposal banner like a pro, but my wife wasn’t exactly over the moon with that idea.

Instead, we compromised and allowed Oscar to wear his tux down the aisle. Oh, but did I mention that I’m now relegated to being chauffeur on our honeymoon in Iceland? Probably should have researched that one a bit more before agreeing – there’s going to be a lot of driving!

So today, I married a gal who’s already helping protect me from my own stupid ideas. It’s a perfect match. She can’t get enough of her kale smoothies, and I can’t get enough of my Lucky Charms. She goes bananas for dried fruit, and I just start gagging at the scent of dried fruit – and bananas. But she bakes a mean pumpkin pie, and that has to be worth something. Right?

Last but not least, I want to thank my parents for all the tough love, and Haley just wants to apologize to hers for marrying a guy who still can’t tie his shoelaces. And you thought I was just a casual loafer-wearing kinda guy …

Thank you as well to my main man Benji and our bridesmaids, Kayla and Reese. And to everyone who is sitting before us, thank you for coming and for listening to me speak – and for not making a hasty retreat!

But seriously, you guys have given us so much love and it’s been a real treat to share our day with you. Let’s raise a glass to love and laughter, and the adventures to come.

5. Safe Groom Speech

If you still don’t know how to start your wedding speech, consider keeping things traditional. This final speech avoids anything too adventurous and focuses on giving thanks and honoring the happy couple’s love.

The Speech

Alina and I would like to take a few moments to thank you for attending our wedding this afternoon. We’re grateful for the kind words and best wishes for the future, and we couldn’t be happier with how this day turned out.

It was a beautiful day without a cloud in the sky, just like we wanted. I prayed that the sun would sparkle off Alina’s dress, capturing her glow and her radiant face. As you witnessed today, my prayers came through.

Thank you to my parents, Mr. and Mrs. Banik, and Alina’s parents, Mr. and Mrs. Gizinski, for their generosity and hospitality. Without their support I could not have given Alina the wedding of her dreams.

I also want to thank Alina for agreeing to marry me. I promise to never let a day go by in which I don’t say “I love you.”

People like to ask us where we met. As it turns out, we met in the library on 24th Street. I was rushing around that day, and I bumped into a pretty girl carrying an armload of books. They flew everywhere, but somehow, we didn’t seem to notice.

To commemorate that happy day, I made a library donation to get our names on the brick wall. Our brick reads, “Daniel and Alina, love lights the way.”

I also want to thank everyone in our wedding party for their assistance, and everyone else who’s helped make this day a success. We have a few special gifts for our mothers and bridesmaids, and we’ll deliver them after the speeches have finished.

Thank you again for coming to our wedding. Let’s raise our glasses for a toast.

Speechwriting Assistance

If you’ve tried but still don’t know how to start a grooms wedding speech, you might consider reaching out to Compose.ly for speechwriting services. Receiving a speech that appears like you wrote it? Now that’s major stress reduction right there.

This post was written by Compose.ly writer Emily Clayton.